


Animagi : third step

by themistyeyeofthemountain



Series: We were brilliant until we died [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Animagus, Gen, Hogwarts Era, Marauders' Era, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-10
Updated: 2014-11-10
Packaged: 2018-02-23 06:26:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2537573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themistyeyeofthemountain/pseuds/themistyeyeofthemountain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The third step in the Animagus transformation consists in discovering the animal you transform into - the animal hidden deep within your mind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Animagi : third step

**Author's Note:**

> Lovely people, you must know English isn't my first language -it isn't even the second one-, so please be indulgent. Besides, this is my first fic ever, so if you were kind enough to leave a comment, it would mean the world to me.  
> This happens at the end of their third year as I figured it would take them around a year and a half to achieve the whole transformation after this happens.  
> This has been beta'd by my lovely Camila -te quiero de aqui hasta el infinito-, and all errors are mine and mine only. Now that all has been said, read and enjoy!  
> And as for the disclaimer, I own nothing. Well, this idea of steps is mine (even though I'm sure someone else thought of it before I did but then I wouldn't know), but all the characters and situations mentioned belong to JKR.

It's a warm May afternoon and it seems half of Hogwarts has had the same idea at the same time. This great idea is mainly going outdoors and enjoying the sun and the sweet, summer-like breeze before the exams-induced frenzy starts and everyone is too busy studying to be able to spend an idle afternoon sprawled on the lawn that stretches before the castle's doors. Usually, the Marauders would have taken part of this massive exodus towards warmth and light, but today the beech they have unofficially claimed theirs shadows nothing but green strands of grass. A few people wonder over their conspicuous absence, but it stays unnoticed for the most part.

Some hours before, just after lunch, Remus had told the rest of them he would be going to the library to study for a while. He'd been expecting some kind of token resistance from James or Sirius (“But Moony! We've still got a month till the exams! And anyway, you already know everything. Stop snogging books when you think no one's seeing you and come have fun with us!” “Exactly my point, Sirius. We've got four weeks to memorize every single thing we were supposed to learn this year and I haven't learned because of your antics. Now stop being jealous, I spend as much time with you as with books. I'm being fair enough.”), but they'd only shrugged and waved him goodbye. He still doesn't know whether to be relieved or sad to see his presence isn't exactly essential to them. But he has this bloody list of magical properties mandragore has when mixed with different ingredients left to learn, and he can't allow himself to oversee Potions. So he pushes those thoughts aside and starts biting his fingernails again, eyes roaming endlessly over the textbook.

The rest of their little group isn't exactly having _fun_. They're all in their dorm, each of them sitting on their respective beds. The air in the room is hot and stuffed as the curtains have been drawn, giving a red tinge to the dark room. James insisted upon this particular point ( _“We have to concentrate, lads. The sun won't help us.”_ ), but now seems to be regretting it as a trickle of sweat goes all the way down from his temple to his jaw. “Brilliant idea you've had here, Jamesie”, murmurs Sirius, who sits cross-legged on his bed, and Peter, though he usually doesn't dare to contest James, can only nod for this one. The hazel-eyed boy grunts something that sounds like “Fuckin' random heatwave in _May_ ” and then falls silent. Usually, when it's so hot, Remus casts Cooling charms around the room (the ones Flitwick uses don't reach the top of Gryffindor tower), but they'll have to do without it today. For a moment, the only sound to be heard is the heavy breathing of the three teenagers; but Peter soon breaks the silence. “So. Sirius, you said you knew what's next. Remus won't be staying in the library the whole afternoon, we better start now.” The second part of his statement is met by two pairs of incredulous eyes, and James shakes his head, mumbling about “... book-snogging... ink addict... even worse than chocolate...”. “OK, fine,” Peter admits, “he _will_ be in the library until we go and drag him, but anyway, this is _not_ easy. We should do it now.” The two other boys know Peter isn't exactly eager to work a whole afternoon when there's sunshine, blue sky and Mary MacDonald outdoors, but he's aware what they're doing is a lot more difficult for him than for the two of them, and he will need a lot of time to master the third step of the Animagus transformation, which they're supposed to start now. So, instead of his usual teasing, Sirius just nods. He's the one who's had to spend hours researching about this part of the project when they discovered it wasn't about accumulating knowledge anymore but rather a kind of introspection only permitted by the potion they had to make (step two) and the right state of mind. He happens to be the most sensitive about this whole Animagus thing, which is quite surprising considering his usual bluntness and lack of delicacy (his own words, mind you). That's why he and not Pete nor James (who, by the way, are too busy respectively being tutored by Remus for the oncoming tests and training for the Slytherin vs Gryffindor match) was the one who flipped through pages of dusty, absolutely restricted old books, trying to understand how the hell were they going to see their animal forms. Now, the thing is explaining it to the other two. He doesn't have Remus' knack for teaching, but he'll try.

“OK. So this is about seeing our future animal form. You know it's based on your personality. Every person has an animal form hidden in their mind that represents their dominant traits, and it's this facet the wizards summon when they become Animagi. But we don't _know_ for sure the animal with whom we're linked, and that's what this step is for.” They already know this, but he thinks it's necessary to remind them the _why_ of the effort. Besides of Moony tearing himself apart every month, that is. Peter nods and James cocks an eyebrow, slightly impressed. Sirius is being very... well, serious (no pun intented here, though) about all this. It seems some of Remus' didactic skills have been inherited by the raven-haired boy, who continues his speech. “After drinking the potion we did last week, you have to start breathing deeply, eyes closed. The potion is here to highlight this part in us where the animal is hidden, so you just have to concentrate. The book says it feels like something's being pulled inside of you, so look out for that. This,” he says, showing the vials full of what looks like light put in a bottle, “also helps you to slide into a meditating state. All of it combined is supposed to show you your animal form.” “And that's all?” James asks.“Yup. But it's not as easy as it sounds. I read it usually takes three or four times to properly visualize your form. You only take the potion once though, its effects last a few weeks, which is enough to master the step.” Peter eagerly nods as James bounces to his feet and gives a vial of potion to each of them, then settles on his bed again. The liquid is fresh and tasteless. Soon enough, there is no more noise in the room, apart from their calm breathing and the occasional flap of the curtains.

At first, Sirius doesn't feel anything. He stays seated, quiet, acutely aware of his surroundings and of the heavy atmosphere of the room. A drop of sweat rolls down his neck and he just wishes Remus was here to cast a bloody Cooling charm on their dorm. He pictures his friend's face in his mind, suddenly unable to think of something else than light brown locks, faint silver scars, pale skin and liquid-amber eyes. He thinks of a soft, steady voice, of delicate hands, ink-smeared fingers and bitten nails, of the way Moony looks when he's asleep on his hospital bed, covered in blood-stained bandages. And suddenly he _feels_ it. It's like a distant call, something tugging at his mind, just out of his reach. He tries to grasp it, but it's an elusive sensation, cool water running between his fingers. He goes deeper and deeper inside his own mind, attracted to the faint flicker of light like a moth drawn to a lit candle, but without the fear of being burnt. His breathing deepens and, from the outside, he's just a teenage boy with dark, shoulder-length hair and closed eyes who's sleeping in a seated position. But from the inside, it's a turmoil of emotions, colours, sounds and smells, nothing like Sirius thought meditation would be. He hears laughter, and there's an overpowering smell of forest soil with the faint scent of chocolate and rain, and he sees the waxing moon that becomes fuller and fuller as the paws keep thrumming on the damp ground and the pulling is still there but more present, more demanding, and there's this love he feels for his friends and the dark, secret nights in which he cries alone in bed because his ghosts won't leave him and the soothing voice of a golden-eyed boy taking him in his arms and promising of never, ever letting go, and the only thing he can see now is the enormous black dog with stormy eyes that look just like _his own_...

Sirius' eyes snap open and he gasps for air. The room is extremely quiet. James is breathing evenly, eyes shut, a look of deep concentration on his face. Peter seems calm too, though he twitches a bit from time to time, and his furrowed eyebrows show he's not in deep meditation yet. Sirius stays perfectly still, still overpowered by the image of the big, black dog he's had. He can't really believe he's managed the third step in the Animagus transformation at once, so easily. He knows he's brilliant, there's no point in denying it, and James is too -if they weren't, they wouldn't have even tried to become Animagi in the first place, what with Peter's struggling with it-, but how come a barely fourteen year-old boy manages something wizards thrice his age aim at for months before succeeding? Yet he soon dismisses the question to focus again on his animal form. A dog. Reflects his unwavering loyalty towards those he loves, he supposes. He suddenly grins when he realizes this canine form will fully allow him to stand up to the wolf, even more if he really happens to be a bear-size dog. One of them at least will be able to keep Moony in track.

He feels more than sees James returning from his meditating state. The bespectacled boy shifts a little, breathing less regularly. His eyes meet Sirius' and he grins at his friend. “I almost saw it, mate! I felt the tugging and all, and there was a shape, though I couldn't really see what it was. It's brilliant!”he starts whispering, but, being James Potter, is far too excited to keep his voice low. The sudden noise makes Peter twitch and, with a little start, the round boy opens his eyes. “Oops, sorry, Pete. Didn't mean to bother you.” James says, and then, with a smile as wide as Britain, “So? How did it go?” Peter immediately starts answering “Well, it was pretty hard to concentrate, but I felt something pulling for sure. Think I heard... kind of a squeak, too. 'M not sure.” “No worries, Pete. We'll try again and we'll get it pretty soon, you'll see”. Then they both turn to Sirius, who's been surprisingly silent; he usually would've cut Peter and started talking about his own experience. But the truth is he's still a little dazzled by the rush of sensations he's felt, and, most of all, by the fact he knows. It's a bit like he's found a piece of him he'd been missing without even knowing it. He feels... fuller, stronger, more like himself. But he's Sirius Black, and he can't resist the triumphant grin that slowly spreads across his face. He lingers a few moments, loving the taste of building anticipation. When he sees James will resist no more and is opening the mouth to say something, he cuts him off by simply saying “I managed it. I saw what it was.”  
The baffled looks he gets are worth an applause.

 

Later at dinner, Remus throws suspicious looks to his three friends who wear identical idiotic grins on their faces, though Sirius' might be a little wider. “Sirius” he nudges him, “what happened while I was in the library?”. The grey-eyed boy just shakes his head, his smile getting even bigger if possible. “Nothing, Moony. Absolutely nothing.” His statement is met with a incredulous look from Remus, who, after a moment, just shrugs and helps himself with some chocolate pie.  
“Moony,” Sirius asks some minutes after, “if you had a dog, how would you call it?” Remus opens his mouth, a dry, witty answer ready, but he meets Sirius' eyes and seems to see something unexpected. He frowns slightly in puzzlement, but thinks for a minute before answering. “Padfoot. I would call it Padfoot.”, he says at last. Sirius' smile could lit up an entire room.  
“Then Padfoot it is.”

**Author's Note:**

> So, if you enjoyed this, you might also like my other fics on Marauders' era as well (shameless self-promotion, what can I say). Check them out!


End file.
